Hi sweetie,

Hi sweetie,

I’m getting exhausted with missing you. That’ll never go away either, I’m always going to miss you. I hope that it becomes happier missing yous and less sad and tiring ones. We are currently trying to order your cake. We dropped the ball on ordering your birthday cake. I don’t think we wanted to face it. Now it’ll be a scramble to get one for you. I’m sorry, this would have been taken care of had you been here. I have also put off putting up the decorations, but I will do that tomorrow. I will try my best to do Minecraft themed colors. Ellie said she’s kind of dreading your birthday, too. How do we wake up that morning and celebrate? You’re not here to wake us up at 5am. You’re not here to run around like a madman trying to find your gifts. I’m just going to want to stay in bed all day. We have our plans, but I honestly don’t think they’ll all stick. I guess the only thing for this family to do is continue to power through.

Mrs. Madison and Mr. Timmie bought you a birthday gift, a gift card to Papa John’s! She also got me a little butterfly wind chime for you and it’s hanging out on the lanai.

We tried our best with your health, it’s so frustrating that all of this was missed. If someone had caught it, you might be here to celebrate your birthday on Saturday. You always got so excited the night before your birthday. Some of my favorite pictures of you are the ones I took as your “last picture being ____ years old”. The one before your first birthday is precious. You’re standing in front of the fireplace in Tennessee and wearing your teenage mutant ninja turtle jammies. You’ve got your super chubby cheeks and are just standing there. Now the “last picture of you as an 8 year old” is just the picture of you before the last day of school..the last picture of you alive.

I wish something would have happened to me instead of you. You deserved a full life. I love you so much, baby boy. Sweet dreams.