My Isaiah Joseph,

I’m exhausted, but is that anything new? You wouldn’t even recognize Lucas right now. He had a performance at school today with the entire first grade. He sang, he did the hand movements, he participated!

The last and only time Lucas was ever on stage was at his Pre-K graduation in Hawaii. Remember that? The poor kid was so upset, didn’t want to be up on stage, and just didn’t want to be there at all. You would have been so incredibly proud of him. He’s absolutely thriving in school, I wish Hawaii would have let us put him in and the beginning of this year.

Watching you all succeed, grow, and be the people that you are is all I need in my life. I was so fulfilled seeing Lucas and how far he’d come. It’s like I didn’t even recognize my own child in front of me and he was enjoying himself the whole time. When you guys are happy and thriving, I’m as good as can be.

Tomorrow is a busy day filled with the child bereavement event at the zoo and then a birthday party later in the day. I actually don’t want to go to the zoo, but that’s just because it’s supposed to rain and I don’t want to do all that driving tomorrow. However, it’ll be an excellent opportunity for your siblings and maybe we can meet a few people in our situation.

No matter how much I sleep, I’m always tired. I wish I could crawl into a little space with a weighted blanket and get just one uninterrupted night. I love you so much, sweetie. Goodnight and sweet dreams.