My baby boy,
It’s 7:03pm and I’m lying down and writing this to you, that should tell you what kind of day it was.
Nothing crazy happened, it’s just a culmination of the stress from moving and this life has completely worn me down. I had therapy today and I addressed my feelings and me questioning everything. She told me due to all the trauma and loss that I have had had within the last year and a half that it’s to be expected and everything I’m doing is valid. Instead of questioning why I’m doing what I’m doing, I’m supposed to just acknowledge it and realize that’s why it’s there. Easier said than done, but we shall see.
Miss Madison made me some beautiful jewelry today with your ashes. I now have a ring and necklace with your birthstone and your ashes. You’re stuck being with me all the time, I’m sorry. Miss Madison also made a necklace for Ellie. Ellie’s chain broke on the last necklace she had with your ashes in it, so she really appreciated it. Remember how we went over there when they moved in and left those random Hawaiian treats we bought and I think you guys also brought a random toy or two? I’m so glad we had them here, definitely better than the previous neighbors. I just wish you were here to play tag with Mr. Tim just one more time.
I went online today to start registering your siblings for school and to my surprise and absolute excitement, the district we are going to has a military liaison. I looked into it and they’re part of a Purple Star School program that helps military kids and families. Every school we have went to had these, but that’s because they were all in military towns. I looked further into Peters Township and found that they were only one of eight districts in Pennsylvania that are part of that program. Even more amazing, they’re the only school that has it on our side of the state. I wonder if you or the universe had any idea about that and that’s why we found the house in Peters. Maybe just complete luck.
My brain is mush and I don’t think it’s completely functioning as it should. I’m going to go to bed, sweetie. I love you more than anything in the world, my baby. Goodnight and sweet dreams.